'Reflections'

Working through grief takes time and an open heart, to let our pain out, and love in. This is necessary with humanity and with God. 

My journey into grief began with the death of my 23 week baby daughter on May 25,1976, due to my appendix rupturing, and subsequent surgery. This was my second fetal loss, and was quickly followed by a divorce and the loss of 4 step-children. I turned myself inward, and built  Cocoon around myself so no more pain could enter into my heart. 

With the death of my daughter, Heather Marie, I also lost my marriage and those other four children which had become my life. Through t-i-m-e, I was completely alone in my sorrow and Grief, and I had actually put a distance between God and me . . . not because of God . . . Totally because I did not know how to Pray from my heart. I noticed I could not ‘feel God’s Presence. I discovered that it was because I was keeping Him ‘Arms Length’ away from me. It was a ‘protective move on my part.

On May 22nd, Before Heather’s birth, I had a ‘Near Death Experience, during which I was told, “Your child will die.  You shall live. You’ve been given a second chance. A chance at your Christianity. Remember . . . there is a reason.”